What happened to Kaius88 yesterday
08-21-06, 11:36 PM
#16
I hope the best for you and your family, In my opinion as long as it is feasible and non-detrimental to both parties and the children, parents should stay together.. There are always times in life were things get tough, u might not be at home as much and she's fed up with the chores and taking care of the baby... which does happen often
But that’s when every once in a while u should take the initiative and set up a weekend get away.. Have a parent/trusted friend/ ect take care of the baby for the weekend and take your wife out... you don’t necessarily need to go out of town... go to a nice dinner then reserve a nice room at a local hotel and go relax. No baby crying, no bills, no phone calls... believe me it will bring both of you closer and it allows for the intimacy to return to the relationship
Even little things that show her that you still care about her will be enough… many people especially us men, think that we have to do a lot for our partners to appreciate us. When in fact it’s the little things; the flowers u bring home, the extra complement here and there, the note you left on the counter… I’ve just learned that in many instances its not the diamond ring or the car you buy them… it’s the affection and love you show them that keep you happy as a couple… not the possessions
But that’s when every once in a while u should take the initiative and set up a weekend get away.. Have a parent/trusted friend/ ect take care of the baby for the weekend and take your wife out... you don’t necessarily need to go out of town... go to a nice dinner then reserve a nice room at a local hotel and go relax. No baby crying, no bills, no phone calls... believe me it will bring both of you closer and it allows for the intimacy to return to the relationship
Even little things that show her that you still care about her will be enough… many people especially us men, think that we have to do a lot for our partners to appreciate us. When in fact it’s the little things; the flowers u bring home, the extra complement here and there, the note you left on the counter… I’ve just learned that in many instances its not the diamond ring or the car you buy them… it’s the affection and love you show them that keep you happy as a couple… not the possessions
08-22-06, 09:07 AM
#17
Lexus Test Driver
Just want to add, you [Kaius88] should consider a nanny or some kind of a housekeeper. From everything that you have described before, it sounds like you are doing really well financially, so this shouldn't be a problem for you. Taking a baby off your wife's hands or just someone to take care of everyday house duties should definitely off-load a lot of pressure from your wife and will allow her to get out of the house to boost her moral and spirit. Or maybe even consider daycare for a baby? Something as simple as that can make a world of difference in your case!!!
Regarding postpartum and her staying with a baby at night, she really needs to see a professional and get some counseling. The longer it will continue, the harder it will be to change anything. Another alternative, since it sounds like your wife is paranoid at night to make sure your daughter is OK, is to get a video monitor. I think it can give her some piece of mind. In a year or so, your daughter will be ready for a pre-school, your wife will have to let her go. Of course, everything is easy said than done, but PLEASE do not give up and go seek some counseling. I'm fortunate enough (and this thread makes me appreciate my wife even MORE!!!) not to relate to your experience, but from other replies (such as Cali_girl) - it sounds like you are not alone and this is not the end of the world, but rather a wake up call.
We're all here for you, bizarro bro!!!
Regarding postpartum and her staying with a baby at night, she really needs to see a professional and get some counseling. The longer it will continue, the harder it will be to change anything. Another alternative, since it sounds like your wife is paranoid at night to make sure your daughter is OK, is to get a video monitor. I think it can give her some piece of mind. In a year or so, your daughter will be ready for a pre-school, your wife will have to let her go. Of course, everything is easy said than done, but PLEASE do not give up and go seek some counseling. I'm fortunate enough (and this thread makes me appreciate my wife even MORE!!!) not to relate to your experience, but from other replies (such as Cali_girl) - it sounds like you are not alone and this is not the end of the world, but rather a wake up call.
We're all here for you, bizarro bro!!!
08-22-06, 10:34 AM
#18
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Just want to add, you [Kaius88] should consider a nanny or some kind of a housekeeper. From everything that you have described before, it sounds like you are doing really well financially, so this shouldn't be a problem for you. Taking a baby off your wife's hands or just someone to take care of everyday house duties should definitely off-load a lot of pressure from your wife and will allow her to get out of the house to boost her moral and spirit. Or maybe even consider daycare for a baby? Something as simple as that can make a world of difference in your case!!!
Regarding postpartum and her staying with a baby at night, she really needs to see a professional and get some counseling. The longer it will continue, the harder it will be to change anything. Another alternative, since it sounds like your wife is paranoid at night to make sure your daughter is OK, is to get a video monitor. I think it can give her some piece of mind. In a year or so, your daughter will be ready for a pre-school, your wife will have to let her go. Of course, everything is easy said than done, but PLEASE do not give up and go seek some counseling. I'm fortunate enough (and this thread makes me appreciate my wife even MORE!!!) not to relate to your experience, but from other replies (such as Cali_girl) - it sounds like you are not alone and this is not the end of the world, but rather a wake up call.
We're all here for you, bizarro bro!!!
Regarding postpartum and her staying with a baby at night, she really needs to see a professional and get some counseling. The longer it will continue, the harder it will be to change anything. Another alternative, since it sounds like your wife is paranoid at night to make sure your daughter is OK, is to get a video monitor. I think it can give her some piece of mind. In a year or so, your daughter will be ready for a pre-school, your wife will have to let her go. Of course, everything is easy said than done, but PLEASE do not give up and go seek some counseling. I'm fortunate enough (and this thread makes me appreciate my wife even MORE!!!) not to relate to your experience, but from other replies (such as Cali_girl) - it sounds like you are not alone and this is not the end of the world, but rather a wake up call.
We're all here for you, bizarro bro!!!
I really thank everyone in the thread for contributing and speaking out. You guys are my virtual family, and I am truly grateful.
08-22-06, 11:36 AM
#19
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Kaius88, I have not the wisdom nor experience to add to what others have commented, but I'm glad to see that you and your wife decided to work it out.
Hope to hear more fun stories from you
Hope to hear more fun stories from you
08-22-06, 10:01 PM
#22
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I'm happy to hear the two of you are working things out. Good marriage takes work and trial & error to make perfect. No marriage is 100% perfect......or I'll marry myself. 
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